another bride, another jone another sunny honeymoon another season, another reason for makin'whoopee a lot of shoes, a lot of rice the groom is nervous, he answers twice its really killn' that he's so willin' to make whoopee picture a little luve nest down where the roses cling picture the same sweet luve nest and think what a year can bring he's so ambitious he even sews but don't forget folds, thats what you get folks, fur makon' whoopee
My funny valentine Sweet comic valentine You make me smile with my heart You looks are laughable, unphotographable Yet you're my favorite work of art Are your looks less than greek Is your mouth a little bit weak When you open it to speak, are you smart
Don't change your hair for me Not if you care for me Stay my funny valentine stay Each day is valentine's day
VELMA Front step, cha-cha-cha, back step cha-cha-cha, side step, front step, back, and turn. TRACY Oh my god, Penny, there's Link, Link! I can't believe I'm really here auditioning! PENNY I can't believe I'm really here watching you audition! VELMA Fron't step, cha-cha-cha, back step cha-cha-cha, side step, front step, back, and, oh, Amber, look at this motly crew!Things sure have changed since when I was crowned Miss Baltimore Crabs!
VELMA Oh, my God how times have changed, these girls must be blind, or completly deranged! But time seemed to halt, when I was Miss Baltimore Crabs. Amber, that move is far too dirty! AMBER Mother, wake up from that dream of yours, this isn't 1930! VELMA You can laugh, but life's a test! Don't do this, don't do that! Remember, Mother knows best! And the crowns in the valt from when I won Miss Baltimore Crabs AMBER These steps are perfect ammunition. VELMA Let me show you how your Mommy dear, took out tha competition. Girls, go get 'em, boys lets ramba! 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 Those poor runner ups mite still hold some grudges They padded their cups But I screwed the judges! Those broads thought they'd win, If a plate they would spin in their dance...not a chance!! Boys, put me down! Oh, good morning ladies, lets see what you got! COUNCIL MEMBERS Twist, twist, twist, twist, mashed potato, mambo! VELMA Ready-begin On my show you'll never find a thrusting hip or backbone grind bind! AMBER Was that a dance for fleas and ticks? VELMA Oh, you should have seen my bag of tricks! Oh I hit the stage Batons ablaze While belting Aida and preparing SOUFLEES! But that triple somersault Is how I clinched Miss Baltimore Crabs! DANCE BREAK! VELMA Proceed. AMBER Are you scared, we're on live? TRACY No, I'm sure I can cope. AMBER Well, this show isn't broadcast in COUNCIL GIRLS Cinemascope! VELMA I never drank 1 chocolate malt no desserts for Miss Baltimore Crabs! AMBER This one will never get a date in those hand-me-down clothes! VELMA Kid, she'll never get a date 'til daddy buys her a new nose! I would say Oy gevalt!!... if I wasnt miss baltimore crabs AMBER Do you dance like you dress? LINK Amber, theres no need to be creul VELMA wuld u swm in an intergrated pool? TRACY I sure would! I'm all for intergration! It's tha new frontier! VELMA Not in baltimore, it isnt. and may i be frank? 1st impressions can be tough and when i saw you I knew if ur size weren't enough your last answer just blew it! and so my dear so short and stout you'll never be in so we're kicking you out! with ur form and ur face Oh,but it isn't your falt! You're just down with a case of Miss ENSEMBLE Baltimore VELMA Crabs!!...ugh, you may go PENNY I think they secretly liked u! LIL INEZ May I please audition? VELMA Of course not but u can bow and exalt 'cause i am miss baltimore crabs! COUNCIL GIRLS crabs, crabs, crabs
MOTORMOUTH Bring on that pecan pie Pour some sugar on it Sugar don't be shy Scoop me up a mess Of that chocolate swirl Don't be stingy, I'm a growing girl 1 offer big love With no apology How can i deny the world The most of me I am not afraid To throw my weight around Pound by pound by pound Because i'm Big, blonde and beautiful There is nothin' 'bout me That's unsuitable No one wants a meal That only offers the least When girl we're servin' up The whole damn feast Slice off a piece Of that hog head cheese Then take a look inside My book of recipes Now, don't you sniff around For something fluffy and light I need a man who brings A man-size... Appetite I'll use a pinch of sugar And a dash of spice I'll let ya lick the spoon Because it tastes so nice I'll keep it in my oven 'Til it's good and hot Keep on stirring til it hits the spot Because i'm... Big, blonde and beautiful And Edna girl, you're lookin' so Recruitable Why sit in the bleachers Timid and afraid When Edna, You can be your own parade! They say that Black is whack And big ain't in Well that's just bull Cause ladies big is back And as for black It's Beautiful All shapes and sizes Follow me Who wants a twig When you can have the whole tree
