Ass Ponys

as you sleep between the trees i lay above you dreaming
and in my bed amidst the leaves i can barely here you screaming
and all the things that frighten me are circling in the air
it's no surprise they're telling me that it's raining everywhere

as you sleep between the trees the apples have been falling
and as i turn toward the breeze i can hear your mother calling
and all the things that frighten me get tangled in my hair
it's no surprise they're telling me that it's raining everywhere

as you sleep between the trees i lay above you dreaming

the same sun shone through the window glass
the table was set with the good plates
you came down in your new easter dress
and he smiled when he said your name
he called you kitten

who knows if you were right or not
and who cares if you lost or won
you kneel down arranging the wreath you brought
and your back is warmed by the same sun
he called you kitten

this is sadness and here's what you can do with it
leave it in a dumpster for the garbage man to find
this is disappointment and here's what you can do with it
punch it in the stomach and blacked both it's eyes

and rest assured that you don‘t have to worry
i can face your ghost alone
unplug the telephone and close the curtains
casper's coming home

this is sadness and here's what you can do with it
tie it to a cinder block and shove it in the lake
this is disappointment and here's what you can do with it
lay it out in a casket and drop it in a grave

and rest assured that you don‘t have to worry
i can face your ghost alone
unplug the telephone and pull the curtains
casper's coming home

robots coming through the corn
magnus, sir lancelot reborn
for you he lays it on the line
for you defending human kind
built a little wider magnus, robot fighter

robots up around the bend
magnus, with you until the end
for you he takes it to the wall
for you annihilates ‘em all
wound a little tighter magnus, robot fighter

magnus is dreaming of the day
when robots won't get in the way
for you he plays it as it's dealt
for you he'll sacrifice himself
lit a little brighter magnus, robot fighter
scary as a spider magnus, robot fighter

scatman crothers he and i are brothers
he's got an x-tra nipple and i'm fascinated

that moms mabley i heard she had a baby
it's got an x-tra nipple and i'm fascinated

i'm so fascinated by these special people

frank langella he's my kind of fella
he's got an x-tra nipple and i'm fascinated

bo-bo-barigmy chicks they really dig me
i've got an x-tra nipple and they're fascinated

here's my folded finger church and here's the steeple
i'm so fascinated by these special people

i caught you lying again it's pretty easy if you know how to play
so what you say we make it two out of three
i heard you're dying again well what disease have you contracted today
just as long as you don't give it to me as you don't give it to me

you're waiting tables again and you're counting on a generous tip
but then the tipper doesn't always come through
you're in the gables again getting ready for a fabulous trip
you'd better watch or it could happen to you

when the devil's minions take you down try to mark a path
something i can follow
when the devil's minions hit the ground you can point and laugh
cause i won't let them swallow you down

you're on the trestle again and your toes are hanging over the edge
and your reflection's in the water below
we'll have to wrestle again but there's a wager that i'm willing to hedge
cause you can bet i won't be letting you go

when the devil's minions take you down try to mark a path
something i can follow
when the devil's minions hit the ground you can point and laugh
cause i won't let them swallow you down

the dirt farmer's wife is hanging her laundry on the line
she's wasting her life but other than that she's doing fine

the gut wagon rolls trailing a cloud of flies along
holding her nose she's trying to hear the buzzard's song

sidewinder spoiled my shot at my precious forget-me-not

it's a red letter day and we've all confessed to petty crimes
what can she say that hasn't been said a hundred times
the dirt farmer swears his fruit is as fresh as the early spring
what does he care that she's finding worms in everything

sidewinder spoiled my shot at my precious forget-me-not
claimjumper stole my spot next to me precious forget-me-not

the weed garden grows just outside the kitchen door
the dirt farmer knows it won't be in bloom like it was before

sidewinder spoiled my shot at my precious forget-me-not
claimjumper stole my spot next to me precious forget-me-not

it's a lunch buffet for one and an iced tea hold the lemon
seems you overdid the fun and undersold the women
in your amazing life

you wore camouflage today because you wanted to be noticed
chased your valentines away oh man you really showed us
with your amazing life

you never had a rhyme or reason a notion or a clue
a duck insisting that it's rabbit season
if days are numbered this one's two

when the sinners turn to salt and the tigers turn to butter
you swear o god it's not your fault while going through the clutter
of your amazing life

time marches on so i've heard and i won't contest it
still I would like to believe that i've got a bit more time
i could tell this to you but i wouldn't try it
i'm diving down over you like a fighter pilot
but all the ammunition's gone
and all the engines have been blown
watch it all go up in smoke… oh no

i've been put off in my search for the perfect fortress
still i can dream of a place where i know i'd win the fight
i could tell this to you but i wouldn't buy it
i'm diving down over you like a fighter pilot
but all the ammunition's gone
and all the engines have been blown
watch it all go up in smoke… oh no

interstellar overdrive is playing on her phonograph
she believes he's still alive out there in his hovercraft
entering the atmosphere it shudders and it breaks apart
fragments falling everywhere one hits her heart

your lonely sister is praying for an astronaut
she rises from her knees to knock his helmet off

walking in an open field she comes across an ankle bone
takes it home and drills a hole and wears it on a leather thong
having such an awful time accepting that he's really dead
her astronaut's alive and well inside her head

your lonely sister is praying for an astronaut
she rises from her knees to knock his helmet off

thirty candles on the birthday cake
she tries to blow 'em out
does her best but leaves the one still burning
it's hard to figure out
it's hard to figure out she says
picking up the knife
when she considers how the one still burning
best describes her life
she runs her thumb along the knife blade laughing
and cuts the bad part away

reverend father on the t.v. set bringing her to god
she never met him never held his hand
she thinks it's pretty odd
she thinks it's pretty odd she says, picking up the gun
blue pistol in the screen light glowing
there's a job needs done
she runs her thumb along the gun sight laughing
and blows the bad part away

they found her hanging in the neighbor's barn
swinging in the breeze
long legged with her toes near touching
as pretty as you please
as pretty as you please she says picking up the axe
she's walking out beyond the woodpile claiming
she's gonna bring her back
she runs her thumb along the axe head laughing
and chops the bad part away

last night it snowed
powdered sugar cedars lined the road
they looked good enough to eat
but i don't think i would
i can't imagine that they'd taste too good

a blanket white
at least it was when it came down last night
the morning brings the rain
the blanket's washed away
now everything turns back to grey

and now you're there
the rain is falling, wetting down your hair
i hate to be the one to say i told you so
but i believe i might have told you so

so live and learn
the snow is melting, never to return
cross your t's and dot your i's
and write "the end,"
maybe someday it'll snow again

last night it snowed

i know damn well the weeds are growing
in the yard
i realize that it need mowing
but it's too hard

no matter what they say
nothing starts today

last week your cyber girl went missing
from her room
befriending her's a lot like pissing
at the moon

you're drowning either way
but nothing starts today

i'd like to write about the color
of her hair
but every time i try to find it
it isn't there

i'm always pressing play
but nothing starts today
you're drowning either way
but nothing starts today
no matter what they say
nothing starts today

hey man you wanna be the pilot
of a kamikaze aeroplane
instead i bet you're gonna add it to
a list of things you never tried

you're a fifth wheel, a fourth class
third string second rate kind of guy
and sometimes you feel like
a pot lick limp dick butterfly

hey man you wanna jump a canyon
on a rocket powered motor bike
instead i bet you're gonna add it
to a list of things you never tried

'coz you're a fifth wheel, a fourth class
third string second rate kind of guy
and sometimes you feel like
a pot lick limp dick butterfly

sometimes you feel like
a pot lick limp dick butterfly
sometimes you feel like
a pot lick limp dick butterfly

hey man you wanna be the pilot
of a kamikaze aeroplane
instead i bet you're gonna add it to
a list of things you never tried

you're a fifth wheel, a fourth class
third string second rate kind of guy
and sometimes you feel like
a pot lick limp dick butterfly

gimme gimme some love
sometimes you feel like
a pot lick limp dick butterfly
sometimes i feel like
a pot lick limp dick butterfly

your brother got bird lice
from a feather he fixed with a bobby pin
that's a small price to pay
for the privilege of being the indian

he said i'll be your friend
if you give me a dollar a day

in the picture she posed
on the car hood in lipstick and underpants
the very same evening that she
was crowned queen of the harvest dance

she said i'll make you king
if you give me a dollar a day

lonesome sinner lonesome saint
make me a winner or is it too late

in the bright light she looks
like a girl you remember from summer camp
who reached through your rib cage and
tore out your heart with a postage stamp

she said i was your girl
when you gave me a dollar a day

bless me Jesus buddy i have sinned
whatever does the trick
odds are even that i'll fall again
so you better make it stick

what the psychic on the TV said
it kind of makes you think
i can tell you where your mood ring is
you left it on the sink

they were walking down crawdad creek
found a baby in a jar
tried their best to make it spring a leak
but they couldn't throw a rock 'at far

i don't remember where the blind girl was
when she foretold the quake
i couldn't tell you what a king snake does
because i'm not a snake

bless me jesus buddy i have sinned

when hope is gone
we drag the pond
and try to look beyond
the dead end of summer
there's a haze hanging over the town

so hide your eyes
ignore the flies
and try to act surprised
it's the dead end of summer
when all of the grass has gone brown

oh, i've been x'ing out calendar days
there's a pattern to our time apart
do i still exist
in the bottomless pit of your heart

thrown or fell
it's hard to tell
the baby's in the well
at the dead end of summer
you better prime the divining rod

we'll drink unitl
we drink our fill
there's all this time to kill
at the dead end of summer
with the bugs singing louder than god