In your mind you have abilities you know To telepath messages through the vast unknown Please close your eyes and concentrate With every thought you think Upon the recitation we're about to sing
Calling occupants of interplanetary craft Calling occupants of interplanetary, most extraordinary craft
Calling occupants of interplanetary craft Calling occupants of interplanetary craft Calling occupants of interplanetary, most extraordinary craft
You've been observing our earth And we'd like to make a contact with you
We are your friends
Calling occupants of interplanetary craft Calling occupants and interplanetary ultra-emissaries
We've been observing your earth And one night we'll make a contact with you
We are your friends
Calling occupants of interplanetary craft Calling occupants of interplanetary, quite extraordinary craft
Please come in peace we beseech you Only a landing will teach them Our earth may never survive So do come we beg you Please interstellar policemen Won't you give us a sign Give us a sign that we've reached you
With your mind you have ability to form And transmit thought energy far beyond the norm You close your eyes You concentrate Together that's the way To send the message We declare World Contact Day
Calling occupants of interplanetary craft Calling occupants of interplanetary craft Calling occupants of interplanetary, most extraordinary craft
Ahhh
Calling occupants Calling occupants Calling occupants Calling occupants Calling occupants of interplanetary, most extraordinary craft
Hodad made the scene toting a six-pack of cold cola A stogie smoking in hand A groovin' in his sandals
California's on my mind Surf and sand setting in the sun California's on my mind One day you're gonna be a place in our memory Na na na na na na na
When Woody hit the dunes flying foxtails and Old Glory (Glory) Rubber ripped the sand He gunned a souped-down Stingray Hey hey
Ah, California She's in mythical Malibu Sitting on the ocean Goodbye mythical Malibu The San Andreas Misfortune Will claim the lives of sons and wives The headlines will fill page after page
California's on my mind Surf and sand setting in the sun In the sun in the sun in the sun In the setting sun Ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba One day you're gonna be one sweet memory Oh yeah California
Swingin' on the beach To the sounds of their time Yeah yeah yeah
Late last night while wishing on a star Down from the sky came a man in a car He said "Get in, Jackson Come on let's go for a ride" Outta sight
Sitting in the cockpit strapped down in a chair I said, "Hey, tell me What's that over there?" He said, "Meet my computer." He's a friendly son of a gun and we're having fun
Playing cards on Venus in a cloudy room Pass a glass of ammonia, I got to get off soon Sunbathin' on Mercury or jammin' on Jupiter Which do you prefer?
It's getting pretty late, I got to go home Nice to have met you, what's your telephone? Maybe soon I'll call you If I can afford the fare It's long distance out there
Anus of Uranus, he's a friend of mine He's a first-rate party and a real fine time Anus of Uranus, he's a friend of mine He's a first-rate party and a real fine time
Back in 1870 Just beneath the Great White Way Alfred Beach worked secretly Risking all to ride a dream His wind machine His wind machine
New York City and the morning sun Were awoken by the strangest sound Reportedly as far as Washington The tremors shook the earth As Alfie blew underground Blew underground, he blew underground
Ah, all aboard Sub Rosa Subway Had you wondered Who's been digging under Broadway It's Alfred Poor Al, oh no, Al
As for America's first subway The public scoffed "It's far too crude" One station filled with Victoria's Age >From frescoed walls And goldfish fountains To Brahmsian tunes
The last time I went swimmin' A started to drown and my head ... it went down And then, the lifeguard he jumped in Grabbed hold of my hair an he pulled me to ground He was a true life hero Friend of every man an child A true life hero I really do think it'd be wild
I wonder what it would be like To be the ultra maroon who was first on the moon Cos' who could help but dislike A man, it is known, has the guts of a prune Wanna be a true life hero Friend of every man and child A true life hero I really do think it'd be wild
I could never be like him I could never be strong cos' I'm always wrong So I'll just sit here thinkin' How nice it would be if it only was me Who was a true life hero Friend of every man and child A true life hero I really do think it'd be wild
Oh My love and I were thinking How low our boat was sinking From fishing for the blues Every lure we tried Jonesey turned the tide We lost our cool Caught in whirlpools
Oh So bland was our condition We summoned black magicians To wave a wand or two Talismanic spells Tannis root and well To tell the tale Their magic failed
If that is all you want (Doctor Marvello) Then I may be of service If all you want is love (Doctor Marvello) Well I may know a special man Whose love machine turns can't to can With your mind in mind With your mind in mind
(A passage of time)
Oh The trance wore off by morning A sentimental journey was hazily recalled Though it sounds absurd We're completely cured And now we're fine And now we're fine And now we're fine
(Act One) Well do you get the itching to Trek about the latitudes, you do? Well likely you're a chip Off old Sir Rugglesby Well he was quite a sporting sort Behind his cup o'tea he'd snort I'll wager on the line Ten thousand pounds and five I'm the only man who'll ever get to Hell and come back alive
(Act Two) Now in the fall of forty-nine He skipped across the seven brine this time Looking for a berth in naval history T'was never heard nor seen agian Oficially presumed as dead But the words he left behind Still echoed through my mind I'm the only man who'll ever get to Hell and come back alive He's the only man who'd ever get to Hell and come back alive
(Intermission)
(Act Three) ...then one night While tripping down the English coast The moon was whiter than a ghost, almost When I heard a voice yell through a megaphone And there upon the midnight sea A signal lamp signalled me I could feel me blood run cold As the message did decode I'm the only man who's ever been to Hell and come back alive Well who else could it be But good old Rugglesby? He's the only man could ever get to Hell and come back alive Yes he's the only man who's (He's the only one) Ever gone and been to (Who's been and gone) To hell and come back Hell and come back Hell and come back alive
We're off you know to a distant land And the only ones allowed to come are those who feel they can Go right along with the master plan For we're all agreed that all we need is sitting there in your head Is that all? That's all. That's all? That's all.
So raise the sails and trim all the sheets Set your course and jam all the cleats We'll follow the north star to know where we are so You sleepyheads get out of bed right now Let your fortunes be cast to the wind
And so it's off we go to some uncharted shore 'Cause the only kind we're out to find are those worth looking for You can tag along should you feel the urge to merge 'Cause we're all agreed that all we need is Hope and a little courage Is that all? That's all. Ooh hoo hoo
So raise the sails and trim all the sheets Set your course and jam all the cleats We'll follow the North Star to know where we are so You sleepyheads get out of bed right now Get out the lead full steam ahead smartly now For the journey begins The journey begins Our journey begins come the sun
You tried and were thrown out of the garden Now you find it harder still You seem quite catatonic of late Say your last rites for the world that created you madman Madman
Time passed and you ceased your evolution Where is your solution now It's over You missed your last chance to find the answer Before the last man becomes a madman Madman
Weep now for the children of your children It's not for you but they we sing Do it And when you realize that you blew it You will look in the eyes of the madman Madman
(You blew it you blew it you blew it you blew it you blew it)
Come aboard my ship, I've something to show you Some new equipment to take us where we're going A subspace machine, a hole in the fabric Of the very being of the universe
Ignition Atomic power on We must break our orbit and soar right past the planets It took man a million years To make it only this far And we'll leave the solar system very soon...
Around the universe in eighty days Sit down I think you'll like it out in space There's nothing left to stop us now We're sure to win the race (Sure to win the race...)
In our warp where time and space are one We can no longer see the sun In fact there's nothing there for us to see For light is nowhere near as fast as we
Our computer says we've exceeded expectations When we reach our departure point there will be celebrations What this means is our existence no longer has a limit The universe will be our new home
Now the earth is just beginning to learn of our existence All life in space must learn to live as one Maybe now is the time for friendship with out neighbors For our planet is the second from the sun
Around the universe in eighty days Sit down I think you'll like it out in space There's nothing left to stop us now We're sure to win the race (Sure to win the race...)
Through a fortunate turn of events, this original transcription has been acquired of a dissertation given by the late Professor Charles Pamplemousse R.C.B. at the Eighteenth Assembly of the Heirs of the Politzanian Empire.
Professor Pamplemousse was a distinguished anthropologist of his time whom many believed to be the world's leading authority on the subject of extinct civilizations.
The program concludes with the singing of "The Politzanian National Anthem."
As facts are few and far between hypothesis denies all logic as to what precisely, er, led to her demise. For what appears sheer grandiosity, no legacy remains except her crumbling ruins on which these words were found engraved:
Politzania Politzania Long live Politzania Politzania Politzania God save Politzania
Now these ancient Politzanians as far as archeologists have traced had most thoroughly convinced themselves they were a superior race. Quite a ridiculous notion, granted, however if we assume her sister rivals rose to quell such monstrous claims, I most humbly submit her unpleasant end is satisfactorily explained.
Politzania Politzania Long live Politzania Politzania Politzania God save Politzania
Those citizens who questioned, those suspect harborers of doubt, were brought before a panel of the Ministry of Health. They were tested and encephalographed 'Til rendered quite insane When in accordance with the laws They reprocessed their brains They reprocessed their brains ha ha ha ha They reprocessed their brains
The Politzanian National Anthem
Politzania, brave strong and true Politzania, we all love you We'll smite our foes for we are right And God is on our side
Politzania, red, white and green Politzania, reigning supreme Victors in war Champions of peace Unto eternity
(Everybody now) La la la la la la la la la la la la La la la la la la la la la la la la la la La la la la La la la la la la We're the masters of the world
Sometimes I feel like I'm the loneliest of all creatures in the universe Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no you're not the loneliest of all creatures in the universe Oh no! Oh no!
If I am not the loneliest of creatures There must be someone lonelier than me But I can't believe despair could be much deeper When I'm as lonely as a man can be
Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no you're not the loneliest of all creatures in the universe! Oh no! Oh no!
Suppose I'm not the loneliest of creatures Then tell me who this wretched soul might be In the dark of night there lives a lighthouse keeper And the lone survivor of his world is he The lone survivor of his world Is he
But I feel like I'm the loneliest of all creatures in the universe Yet I know I'm not the loneliest of all creatures in the universe
Sometimes I feel like I'm the loneliest of all creatures in the universe Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no you're not the loneliest of all creatures in the universe Oh no! Oh no!
If I am not the loneliest of creatures There must be someone lonelier than me But I can't believe despair could be much deeper When I'm as lonely as a man can be
Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no you're not the loneliest of all creatures in the universe! Oh no! Oh no!
Suppose I'm not the loneliest of creatures Then tell me who this wretched soul might be In the dark of night there lives a lighthouse keeper And the lone survivor of his world is he The lone survivor of his world Is he
But I feel like I'm the loneliest of all creatures in the universe Yet I know I'm not the loneliest of all creatures in the universe
"I am the very loneliest of all creatures in the universe Indeed I am an epitaph to man For having witnessed mass destruction like you've never dreamed and worse I fear I shall bear witness once again."
So said the lighthouse keeper As he struggled up the spiral stairs Which led him to the laser flare which spanned the cosmic void Where keeping constant vigil He'd forewarn this gallant guard of guards Beware all ships the space graveyard and its stones of asteroids
"For though my race was though immune Themselves they did consume So be warned or be mourned tomorrow And from your deafness do desist And pray take heed of this For your present course can only end in sorrow..."
So said the lighthouse keeper As he wiped a teardrop from his nose Upon which his spectacles rose and gazed out to the stars And like a portrait still he stared And sighing to himself declared "I must invent the perfect prayer Not yours, not mine, but ours
Which in the name of charity Might lead us to eternal peace The ultimate philosophy Some simple, single phrase." The old and much encumbered man Then came to rest with head in hand He thought and thought and thought away His last remaining day.
Epilogue
When to his end the old man came Death told him "You'll not die in vain" And on his lips the fatal kiss was placed
But from within his falling chest The old man uttered one last breath And had we heard his parting word We'd know that he had said...
Hope is like a lighthouse keeper's beam Hope the master cobbler of our dreams For Hope believes in desert streams The mightiest of stars The microcosm in a jar Vast or small they all revolve on Hope
Hope the guardian angel of the dove Hope a gift of guidance from above For Hope is the heart in mother's love No plans could be conceived No ships could fare the seas For there would be no courage were it not for Hope
Now the path before us lies before our very eyes Don't you see And it leads up to the gateway Lead me through Don't you see
Then come and take my hand Raise up your head And dry your eyes For up ahead I see Woh woh yeah A ray of peace A-shining on me
So let us feel Hope And feel the sunrise in our minds To give Hope is to enlighten all mankind Ah but lose Hope and life seems black as blind When faith gives way to fear When motivation disappears All is lost if one abandons Hope All is lost If one abandons Hope
They used to tell me that I was just a fool Dreaming away my time But they soon found the more they put me down The more I blocked them from my mind I used to get my teacher so uptight He had always have to ask his questions twice
I had be a million miles away Drifting through time and space I was a million miles away from any place I was a million miles away In a world of my own A million miles away to parts unknown I had be gone
My 'end-of-term' reports would always show I did pretty well at school But I kept them hid from all the other kids I didn't want to seem uncool My homeroom teacher didn't understand The reason why I never raised my hand
I was a million miles away In a world of my own A million miles away in parts unknown I had be gone
I've flown across the galaxies And been to Berkeley Square I've passed the time with Sophocles But never left my chair
But I'm a million miles away Drifting through time and space A million miles away from any place A million miles away I've built a world all my own A million miles away to parts unknown I had be gone A million miles away
I need the love of a woman That is all I want in the world I need the love of a woman Yeah that's all I'm asking of you girl
I hear the love of a woman Can make your world seem okay Without the love of a woman Lord I just can't face another day
Because I'm tired of being so lonely And you're constantly on my mind So I ask you please I'll get down on my knees If you'll take me home tonight
No I don't want your money And I don't want your car I just wanna be wherever you are I don't need no power No fortune or fame There's just one thing I need Nothing else will do And that one thing I need girl is you, you, you
I get so tired of being lonely And you're constantly on my mind So I ask you please I'll get down on my knees If you will take me home tonight
No I don't want your money And I don't want your car I just wanna be wherever you are I don't need no power No fortune or fame There is just one thing I need Nothing else will do And that one thing I need girl is you, you, you
Because I'm lonely and I'm blue But there's something you could do Oh woman oh woman Now ain't there something you could do I need the love of a woman
When that blue smoke gets in your eyes You'll choke, choke antil you cry Oh you'll die Hey where you gonna hide Well you can talk about the fog in London But listen mister that ain't nothing When that blue Blue smoke gets in your eyes
Now long before the dinosaur had come There raged a global sea from which life sprung A mere few billion years passed on the clock And man became the new kid on the block He could think and he could talk On his two legs he walked in a most peculiar way But soon the very things that set him free Made him a slave of his technology Leonardo, cosa hai fatto tu?
But when that blue smoke gets in your eyes You'll choke, choke antil you cry Oh you'll die Hey where you gonna hide Well you'll be weeping like an alligator And leaping like a hot potato When that blue Blue smoke gets in your eyes
Now let us turn to l'Homme Moderne and see The ultimate in greed and vanity He poaches leopard skins near Zanzibar To line the glove compartments of his cars Oh but you don't even care, you just carry on Carry on your marry way But you had better change your foolish ways Or you'll be sorry come the judgment day Oh yeah you'll see You'll be sorry real soon
But my my my my When the blue smoke gets in your eyes You'll choke, choke antil you cry Wonna die Hey where you gonna hide Well you can talk about the fog in London But listen mister that ain't nothing When that blue Blue smoke gets in your eyes
