Ken Stringfellow

At last I understand the consequences of my love
But how could there be a heaven when they kicked you out
'Cuz you kicked out your chair from above?
Everybody loves to stick with a winner
But you showed me the line between victory and dying
Couldn't get much thinner 'cuz you

You found out how to get down
Down Like Me

When my self-pity became less than full time work
I meditated on the methods and the means
And whether or not it would hurt
Then I got the call they found you swinging out over the earth
So over me you win again
In finishes, forms, in finals and in firsts

You finally had to get down
Down Like Me

"By the time you read this I will no longer be here"
I had to read these words to all your family/friends
Everybody you never held dear
We'll keep an empty place at dinner forever
And I'll maintain and empty chair so you can set in
And we'll never grow old together

You showed 'em how to get down
Down Like Me

Drink up and pay and it's time to move on
This place is dying and they've turned the lights on
Nobody wants to hear the ravings of a bad drunk
They're afraid he'll speak their minds and say

That you'll find yourself alone
No matter who lives in your home
You better find yourself alone

My life's a car wreck on the side of the road
Say nothing but you can't turn away
Not a pleasant subject, so I don't blame you for turning away
It's the least you could do anyway

Then you find yourself alone
No matter who lives in your home
You better find yourself alone

'Cause it doesn't matter--who you are
No it doesn't matter--what you make
Stand on your own or say goodbye
Goodbye

I watch myself laying on the floor
If there's pain here I can't feel it no more
If you're beautiful, if you're young
If your talents exceed your faults
Here's a reason to be selfish

You'll find yourself alone
No matter who lives in your home
You better find yourself alone

Cause you'll find yourself alone
No matter who lives in your home
You better find yourself alone

Despite what you have heard
You cannot cage this bird
The sparrow on the wing
Longs to hear you sing
Once you have opened your heart to its church
You find that the sparrow won't come to its perch

Tears in conceit
Narrow as your caged beliefs

If you must assume the rose may never bloom
Is creation such a fact?
Can it be taken back?
Once you have opened your heart to its church
You find that your heart won't come home to its perch
Years to complete
Arrow winds in two wounds deep
Once for those who put a size on love
Once for those who only look above for sideways eights

Once you have opened your heart to its church
You find that your heart has come home to its perch

There's so much pain
Pain behind us, behind beside us, pain through us
Pain to make us or erase our sense of trust
Pain to bring us close or to undo us

I wanted you
In truth I want you still
But you're so far away
Unless I play the rules by which you want to play

But then I feel you push me back
As if it's challenge that you lack

I say lover reveal love, never conceal love
I want you still
Lover be careful before you lose me
I won't be still

You're so alone
Do you deserve it I know you think so
Do you know what's real?
Are you afraid what something real could make you feel?

You stayed with him
On the losing side, you never gave in
But he's so far away
And if he didn't help you then, he won't today

And you're afraid to make the leap
But I only play my heart for keeps

I say lover reveal love, never conceal love
I want you still
Lover be careful before you lose me
I won't be still

I want you still
Or I could wait for you to come
To the realization

And say lover reveal love, never conceal love--I want you still
Lover be careful before you lose me--I won't be still
Cause I want you still--I want you still

Come all you scions of old-time Berlin
With nights of in tolerance soon to begin
Feel the lights dim
After the rally’s done wolf becomes faun
Sharing a cigarette in your salon- he tries your boots on
Despite the times you feel quite liberal
You even prefer negro spirituals over Ophuls

Run for cover, you’ ll find your lover there
As a shot splits the air
Tell me what you did there- alone or in pairs
With your body bare
Tell me how long you stared before you said yes

You must show no feelings for him tho’ it’s not fair
But these are the uniforms that we must wear
And you wouldn’t dare to resist the order
The fighting is savage the contest is brief
The bloodshed is localized and yet you feel grief in that sweet relief

Run for cover, you’ ll find your lover there
As a shot splits the air
Tell me what you did there- alone or in pairs
With your body bare
Tell me how long you stared before you said yes

A war’s a human thing and to each man it brings
The ability to walk in straight lines
But these lines, they can and do break
If only just to show there ’s only so much loyalty a man can take
Loyal to his beliefs he wears what suits him ’til
He takes them off and shows, and shows what’s underneath
A man who is most beautiful when he’s free

Run for cover, you’ ll find your lover there
As a shot splits the air
Tell me what you did there- alone or in pairs
With your body bare
Tell me how long you stared before you said yes

Tell me what you did there alone or in pairs
Under a nom de guerre
Tell what you did to stop the nightmare
Tell me what you did there
Did to stop the nightmare?
Fortune prefers one who dares
Tell me what you did there

One morning when you wake up all a lone what do you see?
For walls and for your troubles one less friend awakens thee

Just because you would rather wake up alone
Doesn’t mean that another lover’s the worst thing you’ve known

Did no one ever hold you when you cried when you were small?
So now you hold yourself up like a star ? outshine us all

Pretty soon pretty face pretty out of touch
The kind of thing when you lose it don’ t miss it that much,
Not that much

Can’t compete with you
Guess I’ll be complete without you

One morning when you wake up wonder what
Will you do now
Free from despair you struggle for a cause
To now pursue

Never once did it cross your mind to see
That the author of happiness could be sad as me

Shed the old disguises ? try your new luck on for size
One morning when you think you’re all alone
Just wake me up

All I was in front of you was half a face
Eyes held back I let you pass without a trace

But everyone comes to conclusions eventually
That maybe what you didn't want to show them is what they will see

All used up I let them take what was left
I assumed that my good works had no effect
Buy my way, or beg to play it's all the same

But everyone comes to conclusions eventually
That maybe what you didn't think to show them
Is what they should see
Worse that could happen is that you would choose what to turn into
Turn into something that answers this question I offer to you

That's all that you had to say

In the jar there were fireflies
And when their bodies turned black you cried
Cursing someone who'd take away
The living things that you wanted for your play

On the beach there were pails and sand
A helium balloon tied to your hand
Now from the Hamptons to Hollywood
Your pleasure's not as free as it should be

In your life there are living dolls
They can't say no and you want them all
Feeling good as you stretch your claws
And take refreshments that make you pause

Here’s to the future my friends ? hope I can see you there
We’ll have a drink together somewhere, somewhere

Here’s to the future darlings- whatever may come to pass
I send you with my good graces and that’s a fact

What have you got to lose? Whichever paths you choose
Keep in mind that the fates are kind if you let them be so
And I know you will

Here’s to the future brothers-raise your cups in the air
Here’s to the future sisters and all the unlikely pairs

What have you got to lose? Whichever paths you choose
Keep in mind that the fates are kind if you let them be so
And I tell you no lies

Here’s to the future my friends- and all that it holds in store
I hope that each day from now on holds more …

I only called you to say I’m here
Why is talking your greatest fear?
Just abuse me I’m here
Do you remember you promised me
Just to be good and never leave
All I do now is grieve
Goodbye sweet love
Be gone from here
Be lost tonight
It’s better to be alone
For you you’re cover’s blown
My love has been denied
My love has been denied
Oh I wish you’d demand of me
Did I tell you eternity’s a shorter time for me?
Oh you won’t dine with me
The knife and fork are complacency
You set the table for three
Goodbye sweet love
Be gone from here
Be lost tonight
Your cover has been blown
You’re free to be a lone
But if you change your mind
Your love won’ t be denied

Tell me what went wrong
Do you want me not to hear you when you cry?
Did you listen when he spoke?
Am I the question mark you hoped for? No?
Sorry
I’ll go away
Don’t come home early today
The bastard wasn’t cool
Did he play you like a harbor to a fool?
Though your stomach wasn’t in it
As he played you to your limits
As if having them’s what mode you feel secure
You claim not to want me, are you sure?
Any sign at all, I’ll dream it you’ll live it
Any sign at all and I’ll give it I’ll give it
Any sign at all, if it’s a sign of trouble
I won’t stand in your way when it
Comes your turn to stumble

I can stand it no longer, I can’t keep my tongue tied
I’m not one to silently pray
But you loved him first so of course I come second
But now I’ve come forth just to say
That I’m sick of my life, ’cause it ’s always revolving
Around someone who’s threatening to leave
I’ve been looking for something
From you who have nothing
Nothing to give or receive
And it’s true, it’s too true
So you’ll go to him, and I’ll never win
And I’ll settle for somebody else
And make their life empty with my disappointment
That I wasn’t the one who could help
Will we be 32 and just getting wasted
With whoever is left every night
And looking at successful couples with children
And thinking that could never be my life
I want a new deal I demand a rewrite
This script isn ‘t going my way
And I question the morals of the writer who tortures
Me as I inhabit their play
And it’s true, it’s true
The sick thing is I feel about you
The same way you feel about him
And it’s wrong to give up when there’s a glimmer of hope
That it won’t work out or in your case it will
My heart is stocked like my parents’ refrigerator
Just open it and eat your fill
But I grow back slower than an alpine meadow
But only in your footprints am I killed
And it’s true, it’s too true
Am I so bad?

Take care not to hurt yourself
Beware the need for help
You might need too much
And people are such
Take care, please take care

Some people read idea books
Some people have pretty looks
But if your eyes are wide
And all words aside
Take care, please take care

This sounds a bit like goodbye
In a way, I guess it is
As I leave your side
I'm taking, yeah
Take care, please take care